As children, we intuitively read the lay of the land, we feel others emotions along with reading their energy fields.
As a result of this, we learn to modify our behaviour to make sure that those around us will love, nurture, feed, and care for us.
We learn early on that if I do this thing or act this way the grown-ups around me will be happy and so I will feel safe.
Children from the ages of 0 – 7 are sponges soaking up all of this external data that then becomes hard-wired into your subconscious.
Then you go to school and learn about friends and judgements even criticism.
So you further modify who you want to be to feel safe and accepted in the world around you.
Then we move into high school where judgement, criticism and a driving need to fit in and feel accepted drives all of your behaviours.
This pattern is repeated throughout most of our lives.
Always seeking external feedback and validation as to whether or not the way we think, speak, look, dress, walk, is accepted.
It’s no wonder that we experience identity crisis’s most of our lives.
There comes a time in your life when you just have to say F*** it, I just want to be me.
Then begins the journey of letting go of all of the beliefs and labels that were never yours, to begin with.
The question to be asking yourself is…
“How do I feel about this thing?”
“What do I really want to say?”
“Who do I want to be?”
“Who would I be if I could be whomever I wanted to be?”
“What do I really want to do?”
Take time to observe how you react to situations and make your decisions.
Are your decisions based on your needs and desires or are they determined by how you will be viewed, accepted, and loved?
Do you squash down your views and thoughts out of fear of how those around you will judge you?
Is your opinion of yourself determined by the views and opinions of others?
One of my favourite sayings is “If not now, when?”
If you don’t love yourself now, when will you?
If you can’t be yourself self now, when will you?
If you can’t express your views and opinions now, when will you?
If you can’t accept yourself now, then when will you?
In other words, what are you waiting for?
Are you waiting for someone else to tell you that it’s ok for you to be you?
If so then stop!
One of the greatest lessons that I have learned on my own personal self-discovery journey is this.
The more that I accept myself for who I am the more accepted I feel in the world.
The more I value and respect myself the more value and respect I am treated with in the world.
The more I express myself the more actively I am heard in the world.
The more I love myself the more loved I feel in the world.
There is only one you.
No one else can be you and no one else can do you.